October 18, 2023 - Sports Parents Are Out of Control and Officials Don't Feel Safe: Here's What's At Risk, reported by Stephen Borelli, USA Today, Section C, Page One.
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October 13, 2023 - St. Louis, MO - St. Louis Youth Football Coach Says He Was Shot By Parent Over Son's Playing Time, reported by Kim Bell, St. Louis Post Dispatch.
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April 22, 2023 - Deptford Township, NJ - Deptford Township Little League Starts New Rule To Cut Down On Spectators Yelling At Umps, reported by Trish Hartman, ABC TV 6 (Philadelphia, PA).
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October 12, 2022 - Black Hills, WA - Washington High School Football Team Threatens One-Year Ban For Parents Who Confront Coach, reported by Zach Shugan, SB Live.
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June 9, 2022 - Texas - Putting a Spotlight on Parents at a Youth Baseball Game. See So Embarrassing For The Parents. Good For The Ump': Parents Get Into Fight With Umpire At Children's Baseball Game, reported by Tricia Crimmins, The Daily Dot.
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June 15, 2019 - New Jersey - New Jersey Coaches May Get Protection From The Angry Sports Parents Who Go After Coaches' Jobs. See Rah, Rah! H.S. Coach Protection Bill Getting Cheers In Legislature, reported by Matthew Stanmyre, NJ.com.
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August 8, 2018 - Yuma, AZ - Yuma County's Teacher of The Year Ousted By Angry Sports Parents - The Issue Appears To Be Playing Time. See Gila Ridge High School Teacher Dismissed From Coaching Positions, reported by Crystal Bedoya, KYMA - TV.
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August 11, 2018 - Antioch, TN - Angry father allegedly shoots coach for breaking up his son's fight at a football practice. See Police: Youth Football Coach Shot Twice At Antioch H.S., Suspect At Large, reported by Marion Kirkpatrick, WSMV-TV (Nashville, TN).
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April 24, 2017 - Charlotte, NC - Caught On Video: Parent Storms Bench During Youth Basketball Game, Angrily Confronts Coach, reported by Langston Wertz, Jr.
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July 28, 2016 - See Blurred Lines: Are Parents Getting Too Involved In High School Sports? Reported by Richard Obert, USAToday.com, July 28, 2016.
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June 1, 2016 - Washington, D.C. - 70% of kids quit organized sports by the age of 13 primarily because "it's not fun anymore." Rantsfrommommyland blogger Juliana Miner argues that modern day youth sports isn't supposed to be fun ... and that's a bigger problem than it not being fun anymore. See Why 70% of Kids Quit Sports By Age 13, by Juliana Miner, Washington Post On Parenting Newsletter, June 1, 2016.
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Stockton, CA - March 30, 2013 - Brookside Christian Baseball Parents Run Coach Out of Job. Gregg Marsh, Brookside Christian's highly successful baseball coach, found that success was not enough. A group of parents allegedly wanted to run the show, and tried to by intervening in practices, and confronting umpires, players and the coaching staff. Eventually Marsh banned parents from practices. However, he'd already lost the parent/coach battle. Marsh resigned mid-year: another victim of modern day sports parents. See Coach Resigns Amid Parental Pressure by Rob Highfill, Stockton Record, March 30, 2013.
------------------------------
Albuquerqe, NM - April, 2012 - Unsportsmanlike Sports Parent Sues After Principal Bans Him. Can he win? Probably not, but ya never know. See How To Weed Out Trouble Making High School Sports Fans by Michael Popke, Athletic Business Magazine, April 2012 (on-line version) (print version is titled, "Adult Education", and is on page 71 of the April, 2012 version of Athletic Business).
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East Rochester, NY - October 27, 2010 - East Rochester Deputy Mayor Charged With Reckless Endangerment Of A Child For Conduct At A Soccer Game In A League For 5-Year Olds. We've seen parents lose it at athletic contests. However, this one is particularly ugly. Andrew Serrano, the Deputy Mayor, was accused of picking his five-year old son up and throwing him into a chair, causing the chair to flip over, and then throwing water onto his son's face. Serrano allegedly concedes throwing water on the boy, but denies throwing him into the chair. The other odd thing about this is that Serrano allegedly told a Sheriff's Department deputy that he had a "heated argument" during the game with his son. Now, I don't know about you, but 5-year olds tend to be incapable of having "heated arguments" with their parents. Generally, if a parent gets heated, a 5-year old simply lacks the resources to stand up and counter the parent's argument. Most strange. To read the whole story, see Deputy Mayor Andrew Serrano To Resign From East Rochester Village Board by Alan Morrel, Rochester Democrat and Chronicle, October 27, 2010.
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Kenosha, WI - October 14, 2010 - Coaches & Parents Involved In Post-Game Brawl At 5th Grade Football Game: Coaches From Both Teams Dismissed by Myra Sanchick, WITI-TV, Fox6 Wisconsin, October 14, 2010. There are a number of points worth noting here. First, this incident began in the post-game handshake line where members of the opposing coaching staffs had a verbal exchange. Second, parents and spectators are no longer content to sit in the stands; they just have to come out, and when they do things invariably escalate. Third, there's always a camera; this incident is on film. There is one difference between this matter and a number of other matters. The administrators fired the coaches. A lot of administrators tacitly bless misconduct by not cracking down on offenders.
----------------------------------------
Toronto, CA - June 28, 2010 - Sports Parents Gone Mad! Parents Sue a Canadian Hockey League When Their Kids Are Cut From A Team: Are You Kidding? See Parents Sue GTHL After Sons Cut By Team by Lois Kalchman, Toronto Star, June 28, 2010.
June 27, 2010 - How Do Bad Things Happen? WFAS New York's Tony Fiorino, host of WFAS New York's Let Them Play show, describes how youth parents can very easily have incidents. Coach Tony was watching his 9 year old daughter's soccer game when trouble broke out. Hear Coach Tony describe the tension amongst the parents, and the loony dad who ran on the field, andclick here for a show description and a link to the show or click here to jump directly to the show. Ask yourself if the loony dad should have run on the field, if Coach Tony should have spoken to the officials, if other fans should have mocked the loony dad, and lots of other things that could trigger an incident.
---------------------------------------------
April, 2010 - We're Number One: In Poor Sportsmanship That Is! A Reuters/Ipsos survey found that US parents are the worst behaved at youth sports games. See U.S., India Parents Seen As Worst Behaved At Kids' Sports - Survey, Reuters, April 2010.
------------------------------------------
November 9, 2009 - Given the chance, these parents would give their kids Tommy John surgery ... even though the kids aren't hurt. Somehow, some parents have gotten the strange notion into their heads that having surgery enhances performance. It doesn't. The reason that players often come back strong from Tommy John surgery is because they're not pitching, and they're engaging in a massive workout and rehab training program. It's not the surgery; it's the workouts that the kids need. See Parents Want Kids To Have Tommy John Surgery For Stronger Arms, AOLNews, November 9, 2009; and to get more info on Tommy John surgery and the rehab see Once A Desperate Move, Tommy John Surgery Is Now Routine Tool by Will Carroll, Sports Illustrated.cnn.com, March 9, 2011.
------------------------------------------------
St. Paul, MN - April 2009 - Pressuring Their Kids To Win - And Harming Them In The Process. See When The Kids Are Raised To Win by Bob Shaw, St. Paul Pioneer Press (reprinted in The Alamo Revolution).
Wyoming, Ohio - June 9, 2008 - Wyoming, Ex-Coach Settle by Tom Groechen, Cincinnati Enquirer. Pressure from a parent led Wyoming High School to fire Deb Gentile, a very successful girls' basketball coach. She sued the school district, won, and the school district is now liable for $398,831.04 (don't ask me why the figure is so precise- I have no idea). Interestingly enough, Gentile won an age-discrimination suit but she's only 53 years old. It is extremely unlikely that the jury really thought she was fired for age. This reads like a case where a jury decided that the school was just wrong and found a way to make the school suffer. Sometimes sports parents can get a school into a world of trouble.
Detroit, MI - Feb. 16, 2008 - Detroit Renaissance Parents Go Too Far In Trying To Get Coach Fired In Playing Time Dispute. See There's a Truce at Renaissance by Terry Foster, The Detroit News, February 19, 2008. For an excellent discussion of how playing time issues should be handled see Coach vs. Parents, Terry Foster's SportsInferno.com Blog, February 19, 2008. To see the general perception of pushy parents in these types of matters, see Players' Revolt is so Revolting by Mick McCabe, The Detroit Free Press, February 22, 2008.
Madison, WI - Jan. 22, 2008 - Wisconsin Sheriff Goes Too Far To Try To Help Son's Team - Gets Fired For Using His Sheriff Position To Try To Get Opposing Player Suspended. SeeWis. Sheriff's Lt. Fired For Leaking Investigation of Football Team That Faced His Son's Team, Stevens Point Journal; See Details Behind Haney Firing Revealed by Matthew DeFour, Wisconsin State Journal, Jan. 16, 2008.
Fall, 2007 - Sports Parents Take Note: You're Embarrassing Your Child: University of Minnesota Ph.D. candidate Jens Omli's study of adult behavior at sports contests finds that kids don't want their parents yelling negative comments, and even positive comments can be embarrassing. Basically, kids want parents to shut up, cheer for good plays, and then shut up again. See A Sporting Chance by J. Trout Lowen, Connect Magazine (a publication of the University of Minnesota's College of Education and Human Development), Fall 2007 (reporting on Omli's research). Even the best sports parents can unintentionally embarrass their child. Recently, a high school basketball player whose parent is not particularly loud was asked whether the parent heard in the gym was her parent. She replied, "Unfortunately, yes." See High School State Championships: Irish Wins a Title, Rogers Wins Hearts by Gwen Knapp, San Francisco Chronicle, March 16, 2008 page D1.
Parents: The Sportsmanship X Factor by Michael Sudhalter and Roger Phillips, Stockton Record - Recordnet.com, August 11, 2007.
Parents vs. Coach: Battle Goes Wild by C.W. Nevius, San Francisco Chronicle, October 22, 2006 page A-1 (parents to coach: play my kid or I'll make your life a living hell).
Spinola Resigns As Matadors Coach by Robert Jordan, Contra Costa Times, September 29, 2006. Parent complaints force successful basketball coach to resign at Miramonte High School in California. Just 3 years earlier, parent complaints over playing time forced out Spinola's predecessor, Tom Blackwood. Blackwood had coached for 39 years and won 653 games. So what's the deal here? Well, this is a wealthy community with involved, demanding parents who spend lots of money and want to see their kids play. To read about Blackwood's ouster, see Can Parents Be Too Involved? Pressure Driving Out High School Coaches in Wealthy Lamorinda by Mark Fainaru-Wada, Mitch Stephens, San Francisco Chronicle, July 13, 2003 page B-1.
Parents Physically Attack Coaches, Too - As Stakes Rise, More Parents Are Directing Rage at Coaches by Bill Pennington, New York Times, June 28, 2005
Going For the Pros: Being A Good Sports Parent by Jane Weaver, MSNBC Health Editor, MSNBC On-Line April 14, 2004.
Parents "sideline rage" Hurts Youth Sport, CBC Sports (Toronto), June 2, 2001.
Out of Control by William Nack and Lester Munson, Sports Illustrated, July 24, 2000 page 86 (are today's parents out of control - read this article).
1998 - The dirty little secret to the modern trend of parental over-involvement in sports is that the parents' desire to have young kids compete can ultimately stunt a young child's athletic development. Children under the age of 13 need to spend far more time engaged in unfetterred play, free of adult interference, combined with supervised (or coached) skill based work. Excessive competition is what parents want, but it gets in the way of the child's ability to create and take risks because creating and taking risks can lead to a loss if the risk doesn't work out. Also, excessive competition means that lesser players don't get developed. Overly structured, parent controlled competition will not develop great basketball players or soccer players. Some element of free - schoolyard, pick-up, whatever you want to call it - play must be part of the child's development, and the child must have some freedom to create. There are exceptions in sports where repetitive skills can be developed at a very young age or where an athlete must peak prior to puberty (gymnastics is an example of this), but in most other cases, the competition that parents enjoy must be matched - and even exceeded - by both unsupervised and supervised training. Now, it's not just me saying this. The accepted international theory of youth athletic development is Istvan Balyi's Long-Term Athlete Development Model. Click here to read it.
Sports Parenting Books
Parenting Young Athletes the Ripken Way (Gotham Press 2006). Click here for Amazon.com review.
Click here for an excerpt from Rick Wolff's The Sports Parenting Edge: The Winning Edge: The Winning Game Plan for Every Athlete-from T-Ball to College Recruiting, Pond Lake Productions 2003.
Click here for an excerpt from George Selleck's Raising A Good Sport In an In-Your-Face World, McGraw-Hill 2002.
It's Just a Game: Youth Sports and Self Esteem (A Guide for Parents) by Dr. Darrell J. Burnett (Author's Choice Press 2001). Click here for Amazon.com review. Click here for article in Ventura County Star: Burnett Encourages Kids To Play Sports, Focus On Positive Skills, Ventura County Star, May 2, 2006 by Rich Romine.
Just Let The Kids Play: How To Stop Other Adults From Ruining Your Child's Fun and Success In Youth Sports by Bob Bigelow, Tom Moroney and Linda Hall (HCI Press 2001).
Raising Winners: A Parent's Guide To Helping Kids Succeed On and Off The Playing Field by Dr. Shari Young Kuchenbecker (Three Rivers Press 2000). Dr. Kuchenbecker's book is an excellent resource for a sports parent. Click here for Amazon.com review.
Sports Parenting Videos
Click Here For What Kids Wish Their Parents Knew About Sportsmanship - From The MHSAA website (note - this video has been licensed to high school state associations throughout the country; contact your state's sports governing body and you can probably get a copy to use at your school).
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October 13, 2023 - St. Louis, MO - St. Louis Youth Football Coach Says He Was Shot By Parent Over Son's Playing Time, reported by Kim Bell, St. Louis Post Dispatch.
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April 22, 2023 - Deptford Township, NJ - Deptford Township Little League Starts New Rule To Cut Down On Spectators Yelling At Umps, reported by Trish Hartman, ABC TV 6 (Philadelphia, PA).
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October 12, 2022 - Black Hills, WA - Washington High School Football Team Threatens One-Year Ban For Parents Who Confront Coach, reported by Zach Shugan, SB Live.
------------------------------
June 9, 2022 - Texas - Putting a Spotlight on Parents at a Youth Baseball Game. See So Embarrassing For The Parents. Good For The Ump': Parents Get Into Fight With Umpire At Children's Baseball Game, reported by Tricia Crimmins, The Daily Dot.
-----------------------------------
June 15, 2019 - New Jersey - New Jersey Coaches May Get Protection From The Angry Sports Parents Who Go After Coaches' Jobs. See Rah, Rah! H.S. Coach Protection Bill Getting Cheers In Legislature, reported by Matthew Stanmyre, NJ.com.
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August 8, 2018 - Yuma, AZ - Yuma County's Teacher of The Year Ousted By Angry Sports Parents - The Issue Appears To Be Playing Time. See Gila Ridge High School Teacher Dismissed From Coaching Positions, reported by Crystal Bedoya, KYMA - TV.
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August 11, 2018 - Antioch, TN - Angry father allegedly shoots coach for breaking up his son's fight at a football practice. See Police: Youth Football Coach Shot Twice At Antioch H.S., Suspect At Large, reported by Marion Kirkpatrick, WSMV-TV (Nashville, TN).
-----------------------------
April 24, 2017 - Charlotte, NC - Caught On Video: Parent Storms Bench During Youth Basketball Game, Angrily Confronts Coach, reported by Langston Wertz, Jr.
--------------------------------------------
July 28, 2016 - See Blurred Lines: Are Parents Getting Too Involved In High School Sports? Reported by Richard Obert, USAToday.com, July 28, 2016.
-----------------------------------------
June 1, 2016 - Washington, D.C. - 70% of kids quit organized sports by the age of 13 primarily because "it's not fun anymore." Rantsfrommommyland blogger Juliana Miner argues that modern day youth sports isn't supposed to be fun ... and that's a bigger problem than it not being fun anymore. See Why 70% of Kids Quit Sports By Age 13, by Juliana Miner, Washington Post On Parenting Newsletter, June 1, 2016.
---------------------------
Stockton, CA - March 30, 2013 - Brookside Christian Baseball Parents Run Coach Out of Job. Gregg Marsh, Brookside Christian's highly successful baseball coach, found that success was not enough. A group of parents allegedly wanted to run the show, and tried to by intervening in practices, and confronting umpires, players and the coaching staff. Eventually Marsh banned parents from practices. However, he'd already lost the parent/coach battle. Marsh resigned mid-year: another victim of modern day sports parents. See Coach Resigns Amid Parental Pressure by Rob Highfill, Stockton Record, March 30, 2013.
------------------------------
Albuquerqe, NM - April, 2012 - Unsportsmanlike Sports Parent Sues After Principal Bans Him. Can he win? Probably not, but ya never know. See How To Weed Out Trouble Making High School Sports Fans by Michael Popke, Athletic Business Magazine, April 2012 (on-line version) (print version is titled, "Adult Education", and is on page 71 of the April, 2012 version of Athletic Business).
-------------------------------
East Rochester, NY - October 27, 2010 - East Rochester Deputy Mayor Charged With Reckless Endangerment Of A Child For Conduct At A Soccer Game In A League For 5-Year Olds. We've seen parents lose it at athletic contests. However, this one is particularly ugly. Andrew Serrano, the Deputy Mayor, was accused of picking his five-year old son up and throwing him into a chair, causing the chair to flip over, and then throwing water onto his son's face. Serrano allegedly concedes throwing water on the boy, but denies throwing him into the chair. The other odd thing about this is that Serrano allegedly told a Sheriff's Department deputy that he had a "heated argument" during the game with his son. Now, I don't know about you, but 5-year olds tend to be incapable of having "heated arguments" with their parents. Generally, if a parent gets heated, a 5-year old simply lacks the resources to stand up and counter the parent's argument. Most strange. To read the whole story, see Deputy Mayor Andrew Serrano To Resign From East Rochester Village Board by Alan Morrel, Rochester Democrat and Chronicle, October 27, 2010.
-------------------------------
Kenosha, WI - October 14, 2010 - Coaches & Parents Involved In Post-Game Brawl At 5th Grade Football Game: Coaches From Both Teams Dismissed by Myra Sanchick, WITI-TV, Fox6 Wisconsin, October 14, 2010. There are a number of points worth noting here. First, this incident began in the post-game handshake line where members of the opposing coaching staffs had a verbal exchange. Second, parents and spectators are no longer content to sit in the stands; they just have to come out, and when they do things invariably escalate. Third, there's always a camera; this incident is on film. There is one difference between this matter and a number of other matters. The administrators fired the coaches. A lot of administrators tacitly bless misconduct by not cracking down on offenders.
----------------------------------------
Toronto, CA - June 28, 2010 - Sports Parents Gone Mad! Parents Sue a Canadian Hockey League When Their Kids Are Cut From A Team: Are You Kidding? See Parents Sue GTHL After Sons Cut By Team by Lois Kalchman, Toronto Star, June 28, 2010.
June 27, 2010 - How Do Bad Things Happen? WFAS New York's Tony Fiorino, host of WFAS New York's Let Them Play show, describes how youth parents can very easily have incidents. Coach Tony was watching his 9 year old daughter's soccer game when trouble broke out. Hear Coach Tony describe the tension amongst the parents, and the loony dad who ran on the field, andclick here for a show description and a link to the show or click here to jump directly to the show. Ask yourself if the loony dad should have run on the field, if Coach Tony should have spoken to the officials, if other fans should have mocked the loony dad, and lots of other things that could trigger an incident.
---------------------------------------------
April, 2010 - We're Number One: In Poor Sportsmanship That Is! A Reuters/Ipsos survey found that US parents are the worst behaved at youth sports games. See U.S., India Parents Seen As Worst Behaved At Kids' Sports - Survey, Reuters, April 2010.
------------------------------------------
November 9, 2009 - Given the chance, these parents would give their kids Tommy John surgery ... even though the kids aren't hurt. Somehow, some parents have gotten the strange notion into their heads that having surgery enhances performance. It doesn't. The reason that players often come back strong from Tommy John surgery is because they're not pitching, and they're engaging in a massive workout and rehab training program. It's not the surgery; it's the workouts that the kids need. See Parents Want Kids To Have Tommy John Surgery For Stronger Arms, AOLNews, November 9, 2009; and to get more info on Tommy John surgery and the rehab see Once A Desperate Move, Tommy John Surgery Is Now Routine Tool by Will Carroll, Sports Illustrated.cnn.com, March 9, 2011.
------------------------------------------------
St. Paul, MN - April 2009 - Pressuring Their Kids To Win - And Harming Them In The Process. See When The Kids Are Raised To Win by Bob Shaw, St. Paul Pioneer Press (reprinted in The Alamo Revolution).
Wyoming, Ohio - June 9, 2008 - Wyoming, Ex-Coach Settle by Tom Groechen, Cincinnati Enquirer. Pressure from a parent led Wyoming High School to fire Deb Gentile, a very successful girls' basketball coach. She sued the school district, won, and the school district is now liable for $398,831.04 (don't ask me why the figure is so precise- I have no idea). Interestingly enough, Gentile won an age-discrimination suit but she's only 53 years old. It is extremely unlikely that the jury really thought she was fired for age. This reads like a case where a jury decided that the school was just wrong and found a way to make the school suffer. Sometimes sports parents can get a school into a world of trouble.
Detroit, MI - Feb. 16, 2008 - Detroit Renaissance Parents Go Too Far In Trying To Get Coach Fired In Playing Time Dispute. See There's a Truce at Renaissance by Terry Foster, The Detroit News, February 19, 2008. For an excellent discussion of how playing time issues should be handled see Coach vs. Parents, Terry Foster's SportsInferno.com Blog, February 19, 2008. To see the general perception of pushy parents in these types of matters, see Players' Revolt is so Revolting by Mick McCabe, The Detroit Free Press, February 22, 2008.
Madison, WI - Jan. 22, 2008 - Wisconsin Sheriff Goes Too Far To Try To Help Son's Team - Gets Fired For Using His Sheriff Position To Try To Get Opposing Player Suspended. SeeWis. Sheriff's Lt. Fired For Leaking Investigation of Football Team That Faced His Son's Team, Stevens Point Journal; See Details Behind Haney Firing Revealed by Matthew DeFour, Wisconsin State Journal, Jan. 16, 2008.
Fall, 2007 - Sports Parents Take Note: You're Embarrassing Your Child: University of Minnesota Ph.D. candidate Jens Omli's study of adult behavior at sports contests finds that kids don't want their parents yelling negative comments, and even positive comments can be embarrassing. Basically, kids want parents to shut up, cheer for good plays, and then shut up again. See A Sporting Chance by J. Trout Lowen, Connect Magazine (a publication of the University of Minnesota's College of Education and Human Development), Fall 2007 (reporting on Omli's research). Even the best sports parents can unintentionally embarrass their child. Recently, a high school basketball player whose parent is not particularly loud was asked whether the parent heard in the gym was her parent. She replied, "Unfortunately, yes." See High School State Championships: Irish Wins a Title, Rogers Wins Hearts by Gwen Knapp, San Francisco Chronicle, March 16, 2008 page D1.
Parents: The Sportsmanship X Factor by Michael Sudhalter and Roger Phillips, Stockton Record - Recordnet.com, August 11, 2007.
Parents vs. Coach: Battle Goes Wild by C.W. Nevius, San Francisco Chronicle, October 22, 2006 page A-1 (parents to coach: play my kid or I'll make your life a living hell).
Spinola Resigns As Matadors Coach by Robert Jordan, Contra Costa Times, September 29, 2006. Parent complaints force successful basketball coach to resign at Miramonte High School in California. Just 3 years earlier, parent complaints over playing time forced out Spinola's predecessor, Tom Blackwood. Blackwood had coached for 39 years and won 653 games. So what's the deal here? Well, this is a wealthy community with involved, demanding parents who spend lots of money and want to see their kids play. To read about Blackwood's ouster, see Can Parents Be Too Involved? Pressure Driving Out High School Coaches in Wealthy Lamorinda by Mark Fainaru-Wada, Mitch Stephens, San Francisco Chronicle, July 13, 2003 page B-1.
Parents Physically Attack Coaches, Too - As Stakes Rise, More Parents Are Directing Rage at Coaches by Bill Pennington, New York Times, June 28, 2005
Going For the Pros: Being A Good Sports Parent by Jane Weaver, MSNBC Health Editor, MSNBC On-Line April 14, 2004.
Parents "sideline rage" Hurts Youth Sport, CBC Sports (Toronto), June 2, 2001.
Out of Control by William Nack and Lester Munson, Sports Illustrated, July 24, 2000 page 86 (are today's parents out of control - read this article).
1998 - The dirty little secret to the modern trend of parental over-involvement in sports is that the parents' desire to have young kids compete can ultimately stunt a young child's athletic development. Children under the age of 13 need to spend far more time engaged in unfetterred play, free of adult interference, combined with supervised (or coached) skill based work. Excessive competition is what parents want, but it gets in the way of the child's ability to create and take risks because creating and taking risks can lead to a loss if the risk doesn't work out. Also, excessive competition means that lesser players don't get developed. Overly structured, parent controlled competition will not develop great basketball players or soccer players. Some element of free - schoolyard, pick-up, whatever you want to call it - play must be part of the child's development, and the child must have some freedom to create. There are exceptions in sports where repetitive skills can be developed at a very young age or where an athlete must peak prior to puberty (gymnastics is an example of this), but in most other cases, the competition that parents enjoy must be matched - and even exceeded - by both unsupervised and supervised training. Now, it's not just me saying this. The accepted international theory of youth athletic development is Istvan Balyi's Long-Term Athlete Development Model. Click here to read it.
Sports Parenting Books
Parenting Young Athletes the Ripken Way (Gotham Press 2006). Click here for Amazon.com review.
Click here for an excerpt from Rick Wolff's The Sports Parenting Edge: The Winning Edge: The Winning Game Plan for Every Athlete-from T-Ball to College Recruiting, Pond Lake Productions 2003.
Click here for an excerpt from George Selleck's Raising A Good Sport In an In-Your-Face World, McGraw-Hill 2002.
It's Just a Game: Youth Sports and Self Esteem (A Guide for Parents) by Dr. Darrell J. Burnett (Author's Choice Press 2001). Click here for Amazon.com review. Click here for article in Ventura County Star: Burnett Encourages Kids To Play Sports, Focus On Positive Skills, Ventura County Star, May 2, 2006 by Rich Romine.
Just Let The Kids Play: How To Stop Other Adults From Ruining Your Child's Fun and Success In Youth Sports by Bob Bigelow, Tom Moroney and Linda Hall (HCI Press 2001).
Raising Winners: A Parent's Guide To Helping Kids Succeed On and Off The Playing Field by Dr. Shari Young Kuchenbecker (Three Rivers Press 2000). Dr. Kuchenbecker's book is an excellent resource for a sports parent. Click here for Amazon.com review.
Sports Parenting Videos
Click Here For What Kids Wish Their Parents Knew About Sportsmanship - From The MHSAA website (note - this video has been licensed to high school state associations throughout the country; contact your state's sports governing body and you can probably get a copy to use at your school).
Cyber Bullying
Philadelphia, MI - January 26, 2011 - Social Media Abuse Mar Recruiting. C.J. Johnson, a highly touted football recruit, was driven off Facebook by rumors about his mom. See Inside Recruiting Column: Please, Facebook: Help Shameless Recruitniks Help Themselves by Andy Staples, Sports Illustrated.com, January 26, 2011.
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Nashville, TN - January 28, 2010 - Basketball Player Expelled For Threatening To Kill His Coach on Facebook. Taylor Cumnings, a Nashville basketball player butted heads with his coach. So he went home and threatened to kill the coach. That’s right, Taylor got on Facebook and wrote, “I’ma kill em all.” Taylor’s school expelled him. Now Taylor said he was just venting and didn’t really mean it. Taylor’s case raises all kinds of social and legal issues. To read some excellent coverage of the ramifications, see Tennessee Teen Expelled For Facebook Posting by Jaime Sarrio, The Nashville Tennessean, reprinted in USA Today, January 28, 2010; and Expulsion Feeds Debate On Online Rights by Jaime Sarrio and Emily Bazar, USA Today, February 2, 2010 page 3A.
Wolfe v. Fayetteville High School - Are You Controlling Your Cyberbullies? The Wolfe case involves Cyberbullying and Title IX in a different context than we normally see it in athletics, but it has clear athletic ramifications. Billy Wolfe was allegedly cyberbullied by multiple students on Facebook, abused by his classmates, and even beaten up. His crime? His classmates think he's gay; he says he isn't. In either case, school officials don't appear to have done a lot about the on-going harassment so Billy sued under Title IX - yeah, and you thought Title IX was just for female athletes - after all, Title IX specifically says that schools receiving federal funds can't engage in gender discrimination. Billy's saying that gays - or perceived gays - get less protection than straights. Will Billy win? Maybe, but probably not. Title IX probably doesn't cover this. However, Billy has shown that Title IX may be a new way to attack cyberbullying when the cyberbullies launch gender based acts like calling a girl the "B" word on-line or even launching into some of the modern-day "meangirl" attacks that are so prevalent. For more on Billy Wolfe, see Billy Wolfe Sues Classmates, School over Bullying Claims by Scott F. Davis, Northwest Arkansas Times, December 28, 2008, and Wolfe's Attorney Files Answer to School's Response: Federal Lawsuit Headed For Trial In September by Bob Caudle, Northwest Arkansas Morning News, January 8, 2009. If you're confused on how Title IX interacts with gender orientation, don't worry. So are the courts. Click here for legal guidance. At present, Title IX doesn't appear to cover gender orientation but it does cover sexual harassment if you treat the genders differently when they're harassed. That means a guy who is perceived as gay - like Billy - can win his Title IX claim if a straight or gay girl would have been protected by the school. It also means that your athletes could use Title IX as a new tool to fight cyberbullying.
September - 2008 - Media Blogs Create Concerns About High-Tech Bullying by Bill Boyle, NFHS High School Today, September, 2008, page 18.
April 8, 2008 - Cheerleader Targeted For Cyber-Beating - 8 Kids Film Beating, Plan To Post It To MySpace and You Tube. See Mulberry Cheerleader Recovering From Beating by Jeremy Maready, Polk County Ledger (Florida), April 8, 2008. For Video of beating and court appearances, plus reactions see, Beaten Teen's Mom Says Video Was Hard To Watch, by Amy L. Edwards, Susan Jacobsen, and Walter Pacheco, Orlando Sentinel, April 9, 2008. For more, see silobreaker.com's coverage with links to numerous articles and video. This is another example of a sports person suffering from a real-world problem. Beatings recorded on video is an increasingly commonplace problem. A Baltimore schoolteacher was beaten during the very same week as the cheerleader's beating. The beating wasn't delivered for the express purpose of videotaping it, but once under way the student-witness's primary motive was recording the beating - not stopping it. See Teacher Attack Recorded by Cell Phone, WMAR ABC 2 News, April 10, 2008.
Jan. 22, 2008 - Now You Can Track Your Athletes' On-Line Misconduct! But should you? See Extra Eyes For Athletics Staff, Inside Higher Ed.com, Jan. 22, 2008. YouDiligence (a product of mvp sports media training) can run keyword searches on your athletes' Facebook and MySpace pages. You can catch threats, taunting, etc... Should you use it? Well, just remember that you can't be negligent if you don't have a duty to do something and schools and youth programs have no obligation to track their athletes on-line. You can, however, be negligent if you assume a duty and then botch it up. So, if you do this and you blow it you could create a legal problem that didn't exist before. On the other hand ... you may feel a moral obligation to track your athletes.
Sept., 2007 - On-Line Taunting Takes Us Into a Faceless New World by Nate Dougherty, Athletic Management Magazine. This problem does not start in the athletic world, but like many bad trends it has spilled over. To see the non-athletic impact, see Online Schoolyard Can Be A Pretty Scary Place, Burlington Union, April 3, 2007; and Web Sites Add Fuel To Fights by Anica Butler, Baltimore Sun, November 22, 2006.
Boston, MA Aug. 31, 2006 - Teams Take Aim At Online Taunting by Lisa Kocian, Boston Globe, August 31, 2006.
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Nashville, TN - January 28, 2010 - Basketball Player Expelled For Threatening To Kill His Coach on Facebook. Taylor Cumnings, a Nashville basketball player butted heads with his coach. So he went home and threatened to kill the coach. That’s right, Taylor got on Facebook and wrote, “I’ma kill em all.” Taylor’s school expelled him. Now Taylor said he was just venting and didn’t really mean it. Taylor’s case raises all kinds of social and legal issues. To read some excellent coverage of the ramifications, see Tennessee Teen Expelled For Facebook Posting by Jaime Sarrio, The Nashville Tennessean, reprinted in USA Today, January 28, 2010; and Expulsion Feeds Debate On Online Rights by Jaime Sarrio and Emily Bazar, USA Today, February 2, 2010 page 3A.
Wolfe v. Fayetteville High School - Are You Controlling Your Cyberbullies? The Wolfe case involves Cyberbullying and Title IX in a different context than we normally see it in athletics, but it has clear athletic ramifications. Billy Wolfe was allegedly cyberbullied by multiple students on Facebook, abused by his classmates, and even beaten up. His crime? His classmates think he's gay; he says he isn't. In either case, school officials don't appear to have done a lot about the on-going harassment so Billy sued under Title IX - yeah, and you thought Title IX was just for female athletes - after all, Title IX specifically says that schools receiving federal funds can't engage in gender discrimination. Billy's saying that gays - or perceived gays - get less protection than straights. Will Billy win? Maybe, but probably not. Title IX probably doesn't cover this. However, Billy has shown that Title IX may be a new way to attack cyberbullying when the cyberbullies launch gender based acts like calling a girl the "B" word on-line or even launching into some of the modern-day "meangirl" attacks that are so prevalent. For more on Billy Wolfe, see Billy Wolfe Sues Classmates, School over Bullying Claims by Scott F. Davis, Northwest Arkansas Times, December 28, 2008, and Wolfe's Attorney Files Answer to School's Response: Federal Lawsuit Headed For Trial In September by Bob Caudle, Northwest Arkansas Morning News, January 8, 2009. If you're confused on how Title IX interacts with gender orientation, don't worry. So are the courts. Click here for legal guidance. At present, Title IX doesn't appear to cover gender orientation but it does cover sexual harassment if you treat the genders differently when they're harassed. That means a guy who is perceived as gay - like Billy - can win his Title IX claim if a straight or gay girl would have been protected by the school. It also means that your athletes could use Title IX as a new tool to fight cyberbullying.
September - 2008 - Media Blogs Create Concerns About High-Tech Bullying by Bill Boyle, NFHS High School Today, September, 2008, page 18.
April 8, 2008 - Cheerleader Targeted For Cyber-Beating - 8 Kids Film Beating, Plan To Post It To MySpace and You Tube. See Mulberry Cheerleader Recovering From Beating by Jeremy Maready, Polk County Ledger (Florida), April 8, 2008. For Video of beating and court appearances, plus reactions see, Beaten Teen's Mom Says Video Was Hard To Watch, by Amy L. Edwards, Susan Jacobsen, and Walter Pacheco, Orlando Sentinel, April 9, 2008. For more, see silobreaker.com's coverage with links to numerous articles and video. This is another example of a sports person suffering from a real-world problem. Beatings recorded on video is an increasingly commonplace problem. A Baltimore schoolteacher was beaten during the very same week as the cheerleader's beating. The beating wasn't delivered for the express purpose of videotaping it, but once under way the student-witness's primary motive was recording the beating - not stopping it. See Teacher Attack Recorded by Cell Phone, WMAR ABC 2 News, April 10, 2008.
Jan. 22, 2008 - Now You Can Track Your Athletes' On-Line Misconduct! But should you? See Extra Eyes For Athletics Staff, Inside Higher Ed.com, Jan. 22, 2008. YouDiligence (a product of mvp sports media training) can run keyword searches on your athletes' Facebook and MySpace pages. You can catch threats, taunting, etc... Should you use it? Well, just remember that you can't be negligent if you don't have a duty to do something and schools and youth programs have no obligation to track their athletes on-line. You can, however, be negligent if you assume a duty and then botch it up. So, if you do this and you blow it you could create a legal problem that didn't exist before. On the other hand ... you may feel a moral obligation to track your athletes.
Sept., 2007 - On-Line Taunting Takes Us Into a Faceless New World by Nate Dougherty, Athletic Management Magazine. This problem does not start in the athletic world, but like many bad trends it has spilled over. To see the non-athletic impact, see Online Schoolyard Can Be A Pretty Scary Place, Burlington Union, April 3, 2007; and Web Sites Add Fuel To Fights by Anica Butler, Baltimore Sun, November 22, 2006.
Boston, MA Aug. 31, 2006 - Teams Take Aim At Online Taunting by Lisa Kocian, Boston Globe, August 31, 2006.
Discrimination / Social Equity
Maryland, September 2009 - Maryland Sportsmanship Handbook Amended To Bar Racial Slurs. See Race Dispute Prompts Update To Md. High School Football Conduct Code by David Dishneau, Associated Press Wire in Baltimore Sun, September 25, 2009.
Chattanooga, TN. January 19, 2007 - Ooltewah High Coach Suspended After Alleged Racial Remark, The Chattanoogan.com (the coach later admits to using the "N" word to describe the opposing team and is fired). For more, see Ooltewah Basketball Team Captain Supports Coach Baker, by Abena Williams, WDEF News 12 January 21, 2007. The team captain says if a black coach used the "N" word, "Nobody would be going to the school board." Is the captain right? This seems like the topic for a broader discussion. One may wish to refer to Harvard Law Professor Randall Kennedy's book, Nigger: The Strange Career of A Troublesome Word. Click here for more information on this book. Click here for WRCB TV's coverage on the coach's termination.
Chicago, IL. July 17, 2006 - One-Eyed Ref Sues Big Ten Over Termination (CBS 2 website - story from Chicago Sun-Times Newsgroup Wire). For More, See UM Coach Carr Responds To Blind Ref Lawsuit (Sports Law Blog Aug. 2, 2006).
Pennsylvania, May 11, 2006 - Former player Jennifer Harris sues Penn State Coach Rene Portland sued for sexual discrimination. See Harris Stands Tall In Painful Battle, USA Today, May 11, 2006 page 3C by Jill Lieber. Click Here for NCLR coverage. Read the federal complaint in Harris v. Portland. Click here to see Portland fighting back! Penn State Coach Accuses Group of Trying To Exploit Bias Case, USA Today, May 18, 2006. For more see: Portland Vigorously Defends Her Integrity and Penn State Program, USA Today, May 11, 2006 page3C by Jill Lieber; Others Make Allegations, USA Today, May 11, 2006 page3C by Jill Lieber; and Penn State Coach In The Line of Fire, October 25, 2005 Press Release from NCLR. (A strange note to this case - Coach Portland allegedly harrased Harris for being gay, but Harris has always stated that she is a straight woman who simply doesn't carry herself in a feminine manner). The case is over! See Ex-Penn State player, Portland Settle Discrimination Complaint, espn.com, February. 5, 2007. See also, Penn State Settlement Leaves Unsettling Feeling by Mechelle Voepel, Special to espn.com, February 6, 2007. Finally, Portland does us all a favor: she resigns. See Portland Resigns As Women's Coach at Penn State by Dick Patrick, USA Today, March 22, 2007
Chicago, Illinois - April, 2006 - Suburban Black School Districts Accuse White Schools of Racism in Illinois High School Re-leaguing Controversy. See Federal Lawsuit Cites 'White Flight', Comcastsports.net April 11, 2006. Listen Here: Racial Concerns Over Suburban Athletic Realignment, WBEQ Feb. 28, 2005, reported by Jay Fields. To hear NPR Report Click Here - High School Sports and Race In Chicago, NPR March 28, 2005, reported by Jay Fields.
El Salvador - 1969 - Poor sportsmanship is bad, but remember these are only games. It's not like it's war or something, right? Well, not necessarily so. Poor sportsmanship has helped trigger a war so ugly that it became known as the "Football War." The 1969 El Salvador/Honduras FIFA qualifying soccer series was marked by heavy fan violence and rioting at the contest sites. The soccer matches were closely followed by a brief border war. The war may have been brief, but the disruption in trade between the two countries, combined with over 300,000 refugees and a disruption in the Central American Common Market set the stage for the El Salvadoran Civil War, and contributed to over two decades of economic disruption. Was the poor sportsmanship the cause of this war or just something that happened at the same time as the tensions that led to the war? Well, we'll never know. But the poor sportsmanship sure didn't help, and it ultimately led this war to be forever known as "The Football War." Click here for more details.
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Chattanooga, TN. January 19, 2007 - Ooltewah High Coach Suspended After Alleged Racial Remark, The Chattanoogan.com (the coach later admits to using the "N" word to describe the opposing team and is fired). For more, see Ooltewah Basketball Team Captain Supports Coach Baker, by Abena Williams, WDEF News 12 January 21, 2007. The team captain says if a black coach used the "N" word, "Nobody would be going to the school board." Is the captain right? This seems like the topic for a broader discussion. One may wish to refer to Harvard Law Professor Randall Kennedy's book, Nigger: The Strange Career of A Troublesome Word. Click here for more information on this book. Click here for WRCB TV's coverage on the coach's termination.
Chicago, IL. July 17, 2006 - One-Eyed Ref Sues Big Ten Over Termination (CBS 2 website - story from Chicago Sun-Times Newsgroup Wire). For More, See UM Coach Carr Responds To Blind Ref Lawsuit (Sports Law Blog Aug. 2, 2006).
Pennsylvania, May 11, 2006 - Former player Jennifer Harris sues Penn State Coach Rene Portland sued for sexual discrimination. See Harris Stands Tall In Painful Battle, USA Today, May 11, 2006 page 3C by Jill Lieber. Click Here for NCLR coverage. Read the federal complaint in Harris v. Portland. Click here to see Portland fighting back! Penn State Coach Accuses Group of Trying To Exploit Bias Case, USA Today, May 18, 2006. For more see: Portland Vigorously Defends Her Integrity and Penn State Program, USA Today, May 11, 2006 page3C by Jill Lieber; Others Make Allegations, USA Today, May 11, 2006 page3C by Jill Lieber; and Penn State Coach In The Line of Fire, October 25, 2005 Press Release from NCLR. (A strange note to this case - Coach Portland allegedly harrased Harris for being gay, but Harris has always stated that she is a straight woman who simply doesn't carry herself in a feminine manner). The case is over! See Ex-Penn State player, Portland Settle Discrimination Complaint, espn.com, February. 5, 2007. See also, Penn State Settlement Leaves Unsettling Feeling by Mechelle Voepel, Special to espn.com, February 6, 2007. Finally, Portland does us all a favor: she resigns. See Portland Resigns As Women's Coach at Penn State by Dick Patrick, USA Today, March 22, 2007
Chicago, Illinois - April, 2006 - Suburban Black School Districts Accuse White Schools of Racism in Illinois High School Re-leaguing Controversy. See Federal Lawsuit Cites 'White Flight', Comcastsports.net April 11, 2006. Listen Here: Racial Concerns Over Suburban Athletic Realignment, WBEQ Feb. 28, 2005, reported by Jay Fields. To hear NPR Report Click Here - High School Sports and Race In Chicago, NPR March 28, 2005, reported by Jay Fields.
El Salvador - 1969 - Poor sportsmanship is bad, but remember these are only games. It's not like it's war or something, right? Well, not necessarily so. Poor sportsmanship has helped trigger a war so ugly that it became known as the "Football War." The 1969 El Salvador/Honduras FIFA qualifying soccer series was marked by heavy fan violence and rioting at the contest sites. The soccer matches were closely followed by a brief border war. The war may have been brief, but the disruption in trade between the two countries, combined with over 300,000 refugees and a disruption in the Central American Common Market set the stage for the El Salvadoran Civil War, and contributed to over two decades of economic disruption. Was the poor sportsmanship the cause of this war or just something that happened at the same time as the tensions that led to the war? Well, we'll never know. But the poor sportsmanship sure didn't help, and it ultimately led this war to be forever known as "The Football War." Click here for more details.
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